Never Let Me Go
by merrygolds
Summary: Death isn't romantic. It's heart-breaking. [Neville/OC]
1. Chapter 1

If it had been any other year, then the young brunette wouldn't have thought twice about creeping through the corridors of Hogwarts. Of course Filch, the caretaker and stalker of the stoned halls late at night, probably would've been lurking around somewhere, but she could've hid till he passed or just been quicker than his aged steps. But something worse than Argus Filchs' muted wrath and joy at seeing her put in detention would be what would greet her on this cold February night; the Carrow's were sure to be resting in the shadows just around the corners and they would love nothing more than to submit her to the same torture they'd given Neville and Seamus earlier today.

At the thought of the two dreaded sibling duo, she slows her walking, quiets her breathing, and pulls the cardigan she has draped over her school uniform tighter around her frame. Her light blue eyes trace the structures of the hall she's in, searching for the brother and sisters' cloaked figures. Paranoia is creeping up the back of her neck and starting to dig its fingers into her brain and, as its side effects lace themselves in her psyche, she's starting to picture every horrific scene that ends with her death. That's when she decides to hurry along to the Room of Requirement, skipping down the stones of the hallway with tripping feet that scuff the others heel.

Moments later and she's pacing quickly outside a blank wall. Her electric orbs are hidden from view by dark eye lashes that are resting against a pale colored cheek and her accented voice is clipping the words that are leaving her light pink lips in hushed whispers. The echoing of a door opening rushes through the quiet night, causing her to spin around and let out a breath of relief. She knew the others were probably already here; a big group of them were more than likely gathered around Neville and Seamus, demanding that both Gryffindor boys recount their story of discipline and she could practically see Neville's headshake of no while her Irish friend more than gladly jumped into his tale. Smirking at this, she quickens her steps and feels as arms of safety drive away the lingering fright when excited chatter reaches her ears.

"Addy!" Seamus throw's her a happy wave, but isn't able to escape over, as he's currently surrounded by a large mass of their classmates. The brown headed girl just smiles and shakes her head, throwing her hand up in hello.

Her pretty gem-like orbs search over the makeshift beds that line the floors and hang from the rafters above, looking for a brown headed boy who made her heart beat way too fast and her cheeks ache because she smiled too much when in his presence. But she doesn't spot him as easily as she had the Irish lad; maybe he'd slipped out to bring in more students to their widened circle of Dumbledore's Army or perhaps he'd gone through Ariana's pretty portrait to retrieve more of Aberforth's slightly off cooking. The possibilities are endless, especially given his admired status among them all now, but they all let her down because they signal his absence at the moment.

Scouting through everyone once more and coming up empty of her hazel eyed friend, she starts weaving in between all the persons who are littering the cold stones floors until she reaches Cho. She settles beside her and offers up a small smile when the Ravenclaw girl looks over at her.

"Hey, Adara," Cho says. "Didn't want to listen to Seamus' story?"

"I figure hearing it one less time won't hurt anything." Cho chuckles, leaning over onto Adara's shoulder, and glances over where the Irish Gryffindor is vibrantly telling his experience with the atrocious Carrow's.

They spend the next half hour or so talking about the latest gossip they'd heard about Harry and the other's, wondering when this all will end, and avoiding the dreaded question that was lingering on everyone's mind: were Ron, Hermione, and Harry even still alive? It's pleasant and Adara's glad for her friends company, but her mind wonders to Neville and stabs of worry continually poke at her chest with his continued absence. More than once Cho goes off about one topic or another and it takes her a minute or two to catch up with the talkative girl because she's looking around for her pal again. She's validated in her fretting, though; just last week Ernie MacMillan had gone off on his own and Padma had found him crumpled in a corridor corner, hexed by a passing Slytherin who'd caught him trying to sneak into the library after hours.

Her thoughts and Cho's chatter are interrupted when the stone walls of the room shudder out a violent shake that emit little pebbles into the air and onto the floor. Everyone stops, the noise dies down, and they all wait for whatever had just knocked the outside wall entrance to do so again. Orbs reeling over the occupants of the Room of the Requirement, her heart starts to beat as it had when she'd been on her way here and she's clutching at the front of her cardigan again, as if it was going to shield her form whatever was threatening them outside.

No one speaks, for they all know these drills. More than once they'd been sought out by other dark members who were allowed into the castle by their current headmaster, Severus Snape, but it had been a chase down the halls when they'd caught them out of bed or picking them out of class for a 'chat'; never had they found their place of meeting. Still, she keeps to the routine they've instilled: keep quiet, get ready, and watch out.

With her wand drawn out and prepared for a duel, she traces her gaze through the darkness that had been set in by whoever had extinguished the lit candles and bites down on her lower lip so to prevent her worry from seeping out as words. In this large amount of time in which she's wrapped up in her thoughts and getting herself ready, another big, hard shake rattles them all and even knocks a few off their feet. Lavender Brown squeaks out a cry of alarm as she topples into Justin Finch-Fletchley and then he grunts rather loudly while trying to sort her right again. There's lots of '_sshhh's'_ and '_be quiet's_ and eventually the two settle, but their spurts of noise have already been heard by whoever or whatever was resting just outside the thick stone walls.

There's no more big knocks that uproot them from their standing positions, though. In fact, it grows rather quiet and this makes Adara's paranoia return tenfold. When she glances around at the other members of Dumbledore's Army, she notices that she doesn't seem to be the only one who is now frightened. Many have started to back up towards the portrait hole that leads back to Aberforth's, obviously hoping for a quick escape.

A blast, one so large that pieces of rock fly out immediately and knock a few people unconscious, bangs through the large, expandable room only moments later and she's knocked onto her backside, her head slamming into the stone. Spurts of white explode in her eyes as a numbing pain vibrates through the back of her skull. Her bum and back immediately ache from where they've hit the hard bottom. She loses her grip on her wand and is unable to find the mind to blindly search for it.

Whatever had just knocked out the only thing separating them all from the school beyond had done an excellent job, because not only had it found their hideout, but it had also just eliminated half of the people who made of Dumbledore's Army and rendered the other part nearly oblivious.

* * *

**Authors Note:** _Two other chapters to come before the end! How do you like it so far? ^.^_


	2. Chapter 2

Dazed, Adara's head lolls over to one side, her eyes shut tightly to prevent the dizzying white spots from popping into her sight. The taste of iron pools steadily into her mouth until she find herself unable to breath and she has to cough violently and spit in order to just be able to suck in a few clean breaths. Her chest is sunken in from the air that was knocked out when she'd fallen and her nose rings with a stinging, pulsing pain that has taken over all of her face, making it nearly impossible for her to get any oxygen in through it.

Blood streaming out of her mouth, her eyesight nearly gone and her tailbone feeling as if it's been snapped in half, the brunette realizes she's severely vulnerable to the forces that had just destroyed the entire room and most of the people in it. Adara tries to get some focus back by pushing away the cloudy murkiness of stunned confusion, but just ends up with more blood spurting into her mouth. Her hearing is good, though, despite some ringing in her ears, and she catches the voices that float through the smoke filled room.

"Stupid kids," a deep male accent mutters disgustedly.

"Search for any that are still alive and drag them to the dudgeon's. Then chain them up. Lord Voldermort is expected to arrive shortly to kill Potter and he wants all the others out of the way." That was the Carrow sister, her authoritative voice making Adara's head spin even more.

Rocks scratch against each other and rumble around on the stone of the floor as she hears them clear a path. She tries not to flinch too much when a loud screech of pain or an almost non-existent groan is emitted and ignores the questioning thought of which ones they'd passed by because they were dead in order to get to the ones who were alive enough to put out a noise of pain. There seem to be many of them searching through the rubble for survivors, as the loud banging of them moving rocks makes her head hurt so much that she's nearly sick, and she's surprised He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had spared so many of his Death Eaters.

A hard hand slams against her chest, making her whimper in pain and free lungful's of air in a surprised gasp. Then she's yanked up by the front of her clothes and dragged through the shards of rocks and limbs of people, all of which scratch at her mindset and drive her pain to a point so horrendous that she's forced in and out of consciousness. She catches the sound of footsteps snapping behind whoever was dragging her through the hallways during a brief moment of alertness and manages to crack her eyes open enough to catch the pretty blue-like reflection that comes off a familiar head of black hair. Then her friends face rolls around on a head that seems barely attached to a neck and she screams so loudly that it robs her of her moment of strength. The lack of energy now running through her added with the hard shake and slam against the floor her captor gives renders her completely lifeless.

* * *

She's in so much pain that she wonders why her body has decided to bring her mind back from its dark sanctuary. It's a stinging aching vibrating through her bones and burning up her skin and making her mouth flop open in an attempt to scream out in agony only to be met with a frightening amount of blood that has cracked around her lips and increasingly pooled into her teeth and gums. There's no escaping it anymore, either. She remains alert enough to force her eyes open as they stream with silent tears while trying to remain as still as possible because her back now seems broken.

With blurry eyesight, she searches the dank courters she's now in. Bodies lay around her in numbers so great that she's too scared to really take the time to figure them up, there's loud explosions vibrating above her that are shaking lose debris and it's falling on people who don't even move, and blood is coating the floor in so many spots that it's almost impossible to know the true color of the cold stone. Deathly, horrific, and savage-like, the scene is enough to make her close her eyes again and begin to shake in pain and misery and sadness.

Cho's nearly severed head pops into her mind, then she's screaming, digging her fingertips into the unwilling ground while she wails. Her chest protests violently, along with her back, but she doesn't stop. One of her friends was lying somewhere in this horrible room with an injury so deadly that she was sure, that if they were in normal circumstances, she probably wouldn't survive. Many others, too, lay around her with grave wounds but with no way to be cared for. There was probably someone dying right at this very moment and she couldn't do anything but yell out because she was just as hurt and helpless.

For the first time in her life, she wishes for death. She doesn't want to be in the room where she can practically feel the life draining out of her schoolmates. She doesn't want to be lying in a mix of her blood and someone else's. She doesn't want to listen as destruction reigns above her. She doesn't want to be at Hogwarts. She wants to be home, with her dad and Gran, sitting around a fire while they laugh at the strange things her aunt Shelly sends them. She wants to be free of all this. She wants to be dead.

But no one in the heavens or down below in hell seems to be listening, so she continues to lay amongst her dead friends and screams until her throat his raw and her lungs are on the verge of collapsing. Then she's gasping through tears and pain and her own blood as a black silence drapes over the lifeless-filled dungeons.

It's her thoughts that keep her from looking for some form of suicide after that. Happier times when she and Neville would sit so close that she could feel the heat radiating off his body while they listened to Seamus tell them a story play through her mind and she welcomes them. She doesn't get concerned with wondering where he is anymore, because she mindlessly assumes he was one of the first victims the group of attackers had claimed. Instead, she continues to play on the scenes that had taken place years or just days before and she's at ease a little. Anytime Neville was present, whether physically or mentally, she was calm and filled with an unexplained and unmatchable warmth.

She's not sure how long it is before she comes to realize that the loud blasts have stopped, but it's long enough from her awakening that blood is completely soaking nearly every part of her and her lungs aren't really helping her breath anymore. It's labored and hard gasps that she takes in through her bleeding mouth now keeping her alive. Her fingertips, she thinks, are now like her back, broken because she couldn't feel all of them pushing into the floor anymore and she's completely abandoned the idea to open her eyes.

_Almost dead and alive by just a few strings_.

Footsteps hurriedly coming down steps sound through the, now, quiet room, but she doesn't move, thinking it was someone from before come to see if any had managed to stay alive or to the aide of those that had been fighting above.

"Christ." It's a faint mumble and she barely picks up on it. "They're… Are they all dead?"

"Just—start checking pulses! We don't want to leave anyone down here who needs care."

Her heart starts beating rapidly in her weak chest as the realization that these were people who were on her side and her mind seems to come alive with thoughts on what to do. She had no idea how far back she was from them, but, judging from how far away their voices had sounded, she assumes it's near the back, away from their line of sight. For a brief second, she considers doing nothing and letting the thought of them overlooking her beaten and nearly dead body settle in her brain. Her previous wish for death is still fresh in her memory, but now, when she actually has a chance of getting out of here and dying in much better conditions, it seems despicable.

The next thing she does in instinctive: she raises her hand in the air. It gets just barely off the ground and falls right back down after just a few seconds, but it seems to be enough to get one of them to hurry over to her. Hands wipe at her face and then cradle her head, moving it so she's finally looking in the direction she'd been avoiding earlier. Then a cry, one so hurt and pain stricken that it makes her heart ache a little, rips out.

"Open your eyes, Addy. _Please_!" The use of her nickname makes her eyes flicker open for a few seconds, just long enough for her to catch sight of Neville.

* * *

**Authors Note:** _One more chapter left! What do you all think so far?_


	3. Chapter 3

Her entire body is on fire. She's resting in the strong arms of Neville and she can faintly hear as he shouts for people to get out of his way, but knows they don't listen when the hard jostling his frantic steps give to her body stop. Every movement hurts her, though, and she knows that she can't take much else. He won't be able to get to the hospital wing in time; her heart is going too slow and her lungs are just too damaged.

Reflecting back to the time she wished for death, she starts to cry, only knowing she's doing so when the drops gather around her eyelashes. Now she wishes that she'd never asked to be taken away from everyone. She desperately craves a time machine so she can go back and whisper some strength into herself, because now, as Neville profusely yells for her to keep her eyes open and she remembers her father and her grandmother, she realizes that they deserved so much more from her. Anyone else would've fought, but she'd asked to be pulled out of herself—to be taken away from all the things trying to make her stronger.

"Hold on for me, alright, Addy? We're almost there."

Blood spurts out of her mouth when she tries to speak to him and it splatters over his sweater vest, the one her gran had given him one Christmas. This makes her cry more. She remembers that particular holiday she'd spent with him because he'd been so nervous to meet her dad. Calming him down had been useless, as he'd only get more nervous just seconds later, and so she'd held his hand up until he had been introduced to her father. All had gone well and just before he'd been due back at his own house, he'd commented on how he'd like nothing more than to spend all of his time here with her now that he knew her dad approved. And he had. For two summers he'd basically lived with her and it had been splendid.

Other memories, ones of a different variety, twist into her mind through the haze of pain and lack of strength, and she's not sure if she's smiling, but thinks she is and hopes Neville will look down to see that she's not scared. True, she was deeply regretful, but not frightened. She'd spent all of her life cowering in fear at everything and she wouldn't do that with the death she'd asked for, not with her body resting in Neville's arms. If she could give him anything, it would be the peace that she was alright with leaving. Most definitely not content with parting from him or any of her friends or loved ones, but accepting of the fact that it was too late and she only has a few minutes left.

The hallways seemed to be clogged with people, as she can hear their screaming, and Neville pauses once more. He hugs her close to his chest while craning his neck to look over something, then quickly chances a glance at her before returning his gaze to whatever was in front of him. But he does a double take. As soon as his eyes have left her face, they're soaring right back down to lock with her orbs. She can see fear in his pretty hazel eyes.

"S'okay," she mumbles, coughing when trickles of blood slide down her windpipe. "'m not scared."

He shakes underneath her, then, breathless sobs rocketing out of his chest while he holds her even tighter. She wants to comfort him with a gentle touch to his cheek, but is too weak and this makes the tears stream down again. _The words would have to be enough, then_.

Neville dodges out of the way, taking refuge with Adara in a lit up corner of the corridor that people run by without notice. He stretches his legs out and cradles her head in his lap, all the while starting to cry with her. The tears are silent but full of meaning as one aches for the other.

"I should've been there," he whispers, smoothing back her blood matted hair. "I went off to get Harry and the others, and when I came back, people were dead everywhere. I had no idea what happened until Seamus told me."

She pushes out some of the stuff that is filling her mouth before speaking, trying to keep her eyes open. "S'not your fault."

"I could've saved you, Addy... if I had been there."

Nothing is said to that, even though she knows it isn't true. If he'd had been there, then he probably would be as close to death as she was and that thought was something she could barely stand. She would be leaving him, but he was alive and eventually would move on and find a wife and have kids, and, at this moment, that was more than enough for her. He could live while she looked on, while she smiled and fretted with him.

"Love you, Nev," she whispers, feeling herself become lighter.

Her best friend and first loves face contorts into an expression of pure sadness. He raises a big hand to smooth back her hair again while hunching over her body as tears pour from his eyes in large amounts.

"I love you too, Addy," he gets out through his sobs. "And I'll never let go."

"Me neither," she says, the corners of her mouth twitching.

Then she's gone, floating above herself as Neville screams out in anguish and yells her name and cries so loud that it stops everyone. But no one can offer him comfort, not even Seamus, who, with tears in his eyes, comes rocketing around the corner, and the only thing Neville is left to hold on to is the promise that they'd both made.

_They would never let go_.

* * *

**Authors Note:** _And that's it folks! Thanks for all the love. :)_


End file.
